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This story is about a kid
everyone thought was so
terrific and so cool.
That kid was me.
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I knew how to draw
great pictures. I even
brushed my teeth-
most of the time.
And I had a few friends to play with.
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My parents left me
alone a lot. They
thought I was a cool
kid. But that was
only on the outside.
They didn't really
know me.
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Nobody knew what I was really like on the inside-
except my grandma. She wanted to know how I felt.
"What's the matter?" she asked.
And I told her everything, like how scared
I was without a night-light or how awful
I felt when I dropped the ball.
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I liked talking to Grandma. She was a good listener. And I could ask her all kinds of questions. Grandma was the only one I would let hug me.
One day she left for a long vacation. But before she went, she gave me a special present.
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It was a teddy bear!
"Oh, no," said my father.
"He's too old for that!
He's a big boy now!"
"I agree," said my mother,
shaking her head.
"He won't play with it.
He's already
into computers."
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What a weird present for a cool kid, I thought.
"Nonsense!" replied Grandma.
"Nobody is too old for a teddy!
It will keep him company while I am away."
Then I took another look at Teddy
and decided that I liked him-
except for the stupid ribbon, of course.
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He was soft and cuddly
and kind of fun to hold.
I took him with me when
I was sure nobody could see him.
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But when my mother cleaned my room, she put him away at the top of the closet.
"What was Grandma thinking! You're too big for this," she insisted.
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But I took him down
as soon as she left the room.
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Grownups think it is fun to be a kid. But it's not fun all the time. And that's what I talked about with Teddy before we went to sleep. He was the only one who knew how I felt.
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Teddy understood when I told him...
that I didn't like to be alone in the dark.
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Teddy knew I was scared that I would never have a best friend.
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I could tell him I was afraid the other kids wouldn't like me and would laugh behind my back.
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I was scared that I would be picked last at games...
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or that my parents would chew me out
in front of my friends.
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Teddy knew how
I felt when
my parents
were fighting.
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or not talking to each other at all.
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And Teddy knew I was scared that my mother would leave
and never come back! I know it was stupid, but sometimes
I just could not help being scared.
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There were other secrets, too, that I could share with Teddy.
It made us feel much better. Finally we would fall asleep.
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In the morning things
wouldn't look so bad.
I would get ready to
be that cool kid again - the one everyone thought was so terrific.
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I would be as cool as I could be.
Except, of course...
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when Grandma came home again. Boy, was I happy!
On the outside AND on the inside, too!
